The funny things that kids say
Learning to talk is one of the fundamental things the majority of us learn to do as babies. However, being mini humans who are still getting to grips with how their mouths work, those babes come out with some funny mispronunciations.
My son started talking around about two years old and he was definitely the funniest with his words. When he was three, his nursery (kindergarten) staged a Nativity where he played one of the shepherds. He learned to sing Away in a Manger and would happily tell me some lyrics over his post-nursery lunch. Unfortunately, he wasn’t quite up on how to say Jesus properly and called the infant Messiah the ‘little baby Cheesus’. 👼 He’s now 13 and we still remind him of this.
Another of his favourite (for us) mispronunciations was his inability to pronounce baby wipes. He called them wavy wipes. Yes, this is still used in our house to this day too.
Of course, he did inherit his inability to pronounce words from my side of the family. No, not me, but one of my sisters who never asked our mother for a knife and fork, but instead demanded a fucking knife (fork and knife).
On investigating this phenomenon more, I’ve come up with a short list of some of my favourite mispronunciations by other people’s kids. Here they are in all their funny glory.
There appear to be a few children out there who cannot pronounce the name of a very famous fried chicken franchise. Instead of Kentucky Fried Chicken (or KFC), they pronounce it Fucky Fried Chicken.
Food mispronunciation is rife. One child has issues asking for her favourite snack, calling it an Arse Bar (Mars Bar) and asking for a cup of Blackcunt juice (blackcurrant juice). 😲
Getting back more spiritual matters, and one small boy addresses God by shouting out ‘Dear Harry Potter’. It’s meant to be ‘Dear Heavenly Father’, but the boy wizard’s name comes up instead.
Toys can also get the mispronunciation makeover. A young lady who shall not be named just loves her fucket and spread (bucket and spade), while her brother enjoys playing with his Dumb Fuck (dumptruck).